So recently, former U-KISS member Dongho abruptly announced his marriage and his wife’s possible pregnancy in a move that shocked many former U-KISS fans. Not to be outdone, Eli took to instagram like “Y’all think Dongho got married first? Well, I got that little shit beat! I’ve had a girlfriend for 5 years and we’re married and she’s pregnant, suck on that!” I’ve yet to see how K-fans are reacting, though I-fans on omonatheydidnt seem mostly amused and perplexed. K-fans probably won’t care since they’ve specialized in ignoring U-KISS in the face of extreme bops like “Neverland” and “Stop Girl” and are too busy fapping over the latest aural bowel movements from more popular artists instead; J-fans are probably scoffing at how lightweight this scandal is compared to their usual fare. Since Japan seems to be the market U-KISS is concentrating on (which makes sense, since unlike SK they’re moderately successful there), I predict this news shall pass without much fanfare.

On Ahjummas Anonymous, however, we’re celebrating. Congrats to the happy couple, may they have beautiful pigeon offspring!